Sean Lowe and the Women Tell All episode of the Bachelor.

Bachelor Breakdown – The Women Tell All

Sean Lowe gets thrust into the fire of scorned women and empty promises in this week’s Bachelor Breakdown – The Women Tell All episode.

The “Women Tell All” episode is great for a couple of reasons. First, we get to see all the women in the same room for the first time since the first episode. And second, because it gives these women a chance to present their best selves and try to make Sean and America think that he made a mistake. The key word being “try.”

Going into this episode, there were a few questions that all Bachelor fans wanted answers to:

1. Does Des still talk to her brother?

2. Is Tierra 300 pounds yet?

3. How is AshLee handling the breakup? Is she going to talk or just sit there and glare at Sean the whole time? (SPOILER ALERT: She’s still pissed)

Sean Lowe and AshLee argue on the Bachelor Women Tell All.

First off, a HUGE shout-out to the one guy in the audience. Here’s a tip dude: if you are surrounded by women it’s only cool if you are actually The Bachelor. That can’t be a comfortable environment for any heterosexual man. They do a good job of showing the women’s reactions when they are talking about them, but I would have LOVED to see this dude’s reactions for Chris’ opening questions:

1. Who thinks this is the best season ever? (Man claps aggressively and screams woohoo!)

2. What do you think of Sean? (Still clapping, not as aggressively as before)

3. What about Sean with his shirt off? (Stops clapping, puts head down, starts examining his life decisions)

Sean Lowe flexes his pecs with his shirt off at the Bachelor Women Tell All episode.

The episode started off by showing Sean and Chris crashing a few Bachelor viewing parties, including one where he was sexually harassed by a bunch of UCLA sorority girls.

Sean Lowe visits the UCLA campus on the Bachelor.

These visits served two purposes:

1) Reach out to Bachelor fans across the country.

2) Remind Sean that whatever happens between him and the girl that he chooses in the future, there are plenty of other willing fish in the sea.

I wish Sean and Chris would have visited my Bachelor viewing party. I would have given them a nice meal, and I would even let Sean keep his shirt on. Can’t make any promises that mine will be on though.

Tierra was treated like a leper and kept backstage until it was her time to get grilled. She sat in the hot seat and they revisited some of the arguments and issues that she had with the women in the house. Basically every girl in the house had an altercation with Tierra at some point and wanted to know why she was so hard to get along with.

Tierra returns on the Bachelor Women Tell All episode.

Tierra had no answer to rationalize her poor behavior other than blaming the other girls for ganging up on her. Tierra did offer one piece of information that totally explains everything you need to know about her. She was Little Miss Nevada.

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I’m not sure why Sarah was in the hot seat other than to make her go through her painful breakup with Sean again. I haven’t made any jokes about Sarah yet, and I’m not about to start now so let’s move on before I do.

Chris also made Des sit through her breakup with Sean because he is a heartless monster who finds joy in other people’s heartbreak (much like myself). Des said that she has forgiven her brother for possibly definitely ruining her chances with Sean, and insists that she is over it now. Whether Sean picks Katherine or Lindsay, Des will definitely look back on this like the Kentucky Wildcats look back on the 1992 East Regional Final and think “How did I lose?”

Sean Lowe and AshLee argue on the Women Tell All on the Bachelor.

Who would have thought that AshLee’s time in the hot seat would be even more interesting than Tierra’s? AshLee talked about her recent breakup with Sean and how she had moved on and then proceeded to ask about why Sean broke up with her because she had obviously not moved on.

The most interesting moment of the episode – and arguably the entire season – was when AshLee accused Sean of telling her personally that he felt nothing for the other girls. Sean was completely surprised by this and was adamant that he had never said anything like that. They spent some time discussing this and neither one budged on their story. AshLee says Sean is lying, and Sean says AshLee is making this all up.

I’m not sure who to believe on this but I think there are a few different scenarios that are possible. Let’s list them in terms of likelihood starting from “probably didn’t happen” to “yes this is definitely what happened.”

ABSOLUTELY NOT: Sean is secretly a big time player who has been posing as a nice guy. He has told girls whatever they want to hear all season long to win a contest with Arie for who can hook up with the most girls in two months.

NOT LIKELY: Sean is still so heartbroken from his unexpected exit from The Bachelorette that he makes it a point to tell every girl that they are going to stay right before he sends them home so that they can feel the same pain he went through.

I COULD SEE THAT: AshLee is crazy and made the whole thing up to make Sean look bad.

YEP, THAT’S THE TRUTH: While in the fantasy suite, Sean said some things that he didn’t mean and thought would never come back to him because the cameras weren’t on. It was the perfect crime. Mystery solved.

Sean Lowe talks to Chris on the Women Tell All the Bachelor.

Forget the finale, I couldn’t care less who Sean picks next week. I want to get to the bottom of this. I say we cancel the finale and put Sean and all the girls in a courtroom to get the facts. We can get Judge Judy Reinhold and get some testimonies on other stuff that Sean may or may not have said while on The Bachelor.

I am already dreading next weeks three-hour-long finale, but if you told me ABC was showing nothing but Sean and AshLee arguing over what was or wasn’t said, I would be locked in for at least five hours.

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One thought on “Bachelor Breakdown – The Women Tell All”

Talk to me, loser.