Bachelor Breakdown – The Final Two in Thailand

After another painful breakup at The Bachelor rose ceremony, Sean Lowe will have to make the most important decision of his life: Which one of these women will he spend the next two months with? It’s down to the final two on Bachelor Breakdown!

Sean Lowe prepares for the final two on the Bachelor.

ABC decided that the group should travel to Thailand for the overnight dates, which seems fitting because I don’t think Sean is the first American to travel to Thailand in search of love with three different women.

Who Won’t Thai The Knot With Sean? AshLee Goes Home

Sean Lowe breaks up with AshLee on the Bachelor.

AshLee and Sean headed out for some underwater spelunking, or as AshLee would describe it:

I am throwing away all of my insecurities and entering into the depths of uncertainty to be led through the darkness until we come out on the other end as new beings.

Calm down AshLee, you are floating through a cave in a very controlled environment, not plunging into The Abyss.

AshLee acted like she was entering the abyss on the Bachelor.

AshLee mentioned about five times how the cave represented her abandonment issues. Looking back on AshLee’s time on The Bachelor, and how willingly she gave up details about her internal issues, it is amazing to me that she made it this far.

Just a tip for your future dating endeavors: guys don’t like to hear words like “abandonment issues” or “trust issues” or really any issues that you may have. The longer you make a guy think that you don’t have these type of problems, the better chance you have of finding a mate. Stop openly talking about your internal issues AshLee, it may seem like your honesty is bringing you closer together but all he is hearing is “It’s very possible this girl will murder me at some point in the future.”

Gotta give it up for AshLee though, she went out with class. She wasn’t begging to stay on or talking about how Sean was making a mistake. She gave him this look, got in the car and never looked back.

AshLee gives Sean Lowe a crazy look on the Bachelor when he broke up with her.

I’m gonna miss that crazy girl.

And Then There Were Two – Lindsay and Catherine

Lindsay and Catherine are the final two on the Bachelor.

Well Sean certainly has a type doesn’t he? I find it interesting that the final two girls have so much in common. They both love giggling, cuddling, and speaking in fragments of four words or less.

You know when one of your friends is in a relationship with somebody that you can’t stand and you start to think less of them as a person? I am starting to feel this way about Sean. While he isn’t my favorite Bachelor ever, I thought he was an intelligent guy who had his life together, but now I look at the final two girls that he has chosen and I’m not so sure. I really thought Sean might be the first Bachelor in a long time capable of having a serious relationship with the girl he chooses, but now if the bet was set at six months I am taking the under and betting heavy.

Catherine continues to call Sean a “hunk” which bothers me for a couple of reasons: First, because that term stopped being used about 20 years ago, and second because that is not what you call somebody that you are seriously dating.

Lindsay can’t go five minutes without giggling or talking like a baby which is equally as annoying. Coming into the final episode, I have no idea who is going to win and I really don’t care either.

One thing I am excited for is the women tell all episode next week. Let’s forget about Catherine and Lindsay for a week and talk about what an awful person Tierra is again. Those were the good ol’ days where you knew that every week there was a chance that somebody would mix it up with Tierra. Let’s just hope that AshLee is still as pissed as she was when she left the show and Tierra calls her a cougar again. That would at least make up for the snooze fest that will be the final episode.

Who knows, maybe the entire women tell all will just turn into one big brawl with everyone vs Tierra. We can only hope.

2x06-The-Fight-Animated-gif-the-office-8680316-325-188
Fight! Fight! Fight!
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5 thoughts on “Bachelor Breakdown – The Final Two in Thailand”

  1. Am I the only person that reads your blog? I might be. My fiance thinks it is funny. You should pay us to promote your blog.

  2. Seriously hilarious!! My two sisters, myself, my mom, and all my friends read the bachelor breakdown. Always a good laugh.

Talk to me, loser.