Bachelorette Breakdown – The Final Rose

Let’s start off with my top 5 quotes about Jef:

1. Jef with one F looks more likely to start a boyband with his junior high buddies than he is to be a father.

2. He did get a rose even though Emily has already told him she feels awkward when talking to him. Not sure how that happened.

3. I wouldn’t be surprised if he is in the house right now trying to add her on ICQ. Come on Jef with one F you are 27 years old! Time to start acting like a big boy.

4. Somehow he remains on the show even though he looks and acts like a teenager.

5. I’m starting to think Jef with one F is starting to like like Emily.

As you can see, I am as surprised as anyone that Jef won this thing. I thought he wouldn’t make it past the first night when he showed up on a skateboard.

 And now a few random thoughts…

Jef was nervous about meeting Emily’s family so naturally he decided to wear a plain white tee and skinny jeans. Come on man you already look too young for Emily help yourself out a little bit and throw on some levi’s and tennis shoes. New Balance shoes add 10 years to anyone wearing them.

Next time I meet one of my sisters’ boyfriends I am going to be like Ernie. I will ask them to have a talk and use terms like “throughout this journey” or “if you are together after all of this” while we talk about their relationship. They will have no idea what we are talking about. I will also make them call me Ernie.

Did anyone else notice that Arie had Ernie on the verge of tears? Hilarious.

Jef’s family visit went pretty great and I was worried when Arie didn’t show up with flowers. Oh wait, he did! The dude brought all his old roses that Emily had given him. I thought for sure this was foreshadowing to how the rest of the episode would go, Jef does something great and then Arie shows him up. I was way wrong.

Why does Emily feel so bad about introducing Ricki to Brad? Obviously she feels bad that it didn’t work out but what was the alternative? Not introduce your daughter to the man you are engaged to? I don’t understand this.

The diamond master himself, Neil Lane made an appearance. Guess who also has a Neil Lane ring? My fiance. That probably wasn’t a good move on my part seeing as how his rings have about a 10% chance of producing a lasting marriage.

And now some final thoughts and predicitions…

Arie– Arie went through one of the most brutal breakups in Bachelorette history. I generally watch reality television with the same mindset as I do watching monkeys fighting at a zoo but I will admit that even I felt bad for the guy. Let us not feel bad for Arie though. Arie is still a young, good-looking, wealthy indy car driver that now has millions of females that feel bad for him. Something tells me that he is going to be just fine.

I think Arie will be the next Bachelor. Everyone thinks that it will be Sean but I just don’t feel like he would make interesting TV. If Arie isn’t the next Bachelor then I want Kalon. Tell me that wouldn’t be interesting.

Jef and Emily and Ricki-You were probably like me and got caught up in the moment while watching the last episode before you realized that no relationship that is created and cultivated on TV ever works out. It did seem like for a minute that they would be together forever though didn’t it? ABC is good. I don’t want to condemn Jef and Emily’s relationship from the beginning, but these shows don’t exactly have a high success rate. They make drunken Vegas weddings seem like a good idea. I do hope that it works out for Jef and Emily because aside from all the TV drama and editing, they seem like fairly normal people. If two normal people can’t fall in love on TV and stay together then what hope do the rest of us have? I gotta tip my cap to Jef for his performance on the show. After watching a beautiful montage set to “Glory of Love” I realized how well Jef played it.  He was smart and never seemed to get caught up in the drama of the show. Jef gets my final grade this season. Well played Jef.

Thank you for reading the Bachelorette Breakdown

Be sure to check back for Bachelor Pad Breakdown coming soon

 

2 thoughts on “Bachelorette Breakdown – The Final Rose”

  1. Brad, you are new at this Bachelor stuff so you probably aren’t as aware as America is that Trista and Ryan are happily married with 2 kids. There was lots of poetry involved in that season. You would have loved it! Statistically, the reality show match up formula is not working but Trista and Ryan prove that it is possible!! So there is hope for Jef and Emily and I, for one, really hope it works out. This was the best season ever (which isn’t saying much) but I was fully invested. I was not a Jef fan from the onset but I converted and I hope Emily does the same. Ha ha! I can’t believe you didn’t mention Arie’s love potion!! OMGosh! How embarrassing was that? I think he blew it when he didn’t put it on her legs as directed. Poor guy. I agree with you, though, I think Arie is gonna do just fine. Thanks for making a great Bachelorette season even better!!! I am not thrilled with the casting of the Bachelor Pad but I’m probably gonna watch anyway. Hardly anybody that I want to root for but Kalon should make it interesting enough to tune in…

  2. Thanks for the breakdowns! They made watching the bachelorette ten times better! And neil lane rings are beautiful! Nice choice!

Talk to me, loser.